Saturday, March 07, 2009

We're Bigger, Better but Yikes.....You're Barking Back.....Mummy Get Me Out of Here!

A few entries ago, I wrote about Caucasia, a land filled with well meaning people who genuinely want to make you rich beyond your wildest dreams. The Citizens of this fair land have a good heart and while they may not understand the Chinaman's "Sucky Sucky" techniques, their desire to double your initial investment within six-months is genuine. 

For the most part the Citizens of this fair land are ammusing. However, there comes a point when ammusement gives way to irritation. More importantly, there comes a point when irritation becomes anger and there's only one way to deal with one of them - unload your anger onto them and before you know it, they'll run home blamming everyone for their ignomoius situation. 

Citizens of Caucasia are blessed with fine physical attributes. They're physically bigger than allot of Orientals, which means they cut an imposing figure whenever they're in a crowded street filled with sucky sucky Chinamen. I'm told that size matters and so by that definition one has to admit that the Citizens are automatically better (though having worked as a re-servicer for people who deal with the citizens, I'm not sure who's difinition of better we're talking about.) 

But let's not get carried away here. The Citizens are better than the rest of us. However, there is one weak link in the physical armour of these physically imposing people - balls or rather the lack of it. The moment a little ant starts bitting back, they start to run and hide. 

This was made most evident to me when I saw a couple of the Citizens take on a Thai Ant at Naughty Girl, a bar located on the second floor of mall affectionately known as "Four Floors of Whores." I'm not sure what happened but what I saw was a couple of citizens trying to intimidate the Thai Ant and then....all of a sudden...the little ant jumped into a boxing stance. As quickly as the little ant jumped into fighting position, the citizens quickly recoilled and called for the bouncer ....all the ring leader could do was to mutter,"Yea...I'm scared mate," as he slithered away from the fighting ant. 

Of course, these were the uneducated Citizens. For the most part, the Citizens are more refined. A friend of mine was approached to work as a partner for a pitch by one of the government ministries. The company had a week to go before the pitch to the ministry and they asked him to work for them with five days to go. My friend told them they he couldn't do what they asked for within the time frame ..not once but thrice. So what did these guys do --they threatened to sue. After checking with legal counsel, my friend told them that gangster tactics were not appreciated. The Citizen asked him to recamend them a new PR person.

There's no need to be deliberately nasty to the Citizens. As I've said, for the most part, the majority are ammusing. However, there comes a time when you have to remind the hired help that they're still hired help regadless of how well you're paying them. It makes it so much easier for everyone. 

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